FOX: Season Finale Dates Updated For ‘Touch,’ ‘The Mindy Project,’ ‘New Girl’ & ‘Kitchen Nightmares’

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EDITOR’S NOTE: THIS PRESS RELEASE REVISES WHAT WE POSTED HERE.

Via Press Release:

NEW GIRL and THE MINDY PROJECT Have Season Finales Tuesday, May 14;

KITCHEN NIGHTMARES and TOUCH End Seasons May 10 

FOX is announcing new season finale dates for NEW GIRL, THE MINDY PROJECT, KITCHEN NIGHTMARES and TOUCH.

NEW GIRL and THE MINDY PROJECT will now have their season finales on Tuesday, May 14 at 9:00-9:30 PM ET/PT and 9:30-10:00 PM ET/PT, respectively. The season finales of KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) and TOUCH (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) will air Friday, May 10.

FOX season finale events that remain unchanged include: BONES (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) and THE FOLLOWING (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on Monday, April 29; the special one-hour season finale of COPS (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on Saturday, May 4; GLEE (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on Thursday, May 9; AMERICAN IDOL’s two-night season finale on Wednesday, May 15 (8:00-9:00 PM ET live/PT tape-delayed) and Thursday, May 16 (8:00-10:07 PM ET live/PT tape-delayed); BOB’S BURGERS (8:30-9:00 PM ET/PT) and AMERICAN DAD (9:30-10:00 PM ET/PT) on Sunday, May 12; and the special one-hour season finales of THE CLEVELAND SHOW (7:00-7:30/7:30-8:00 PM ET/PT), THE SIMPSONS (8:00-8:30/8:30-9:00 PM ET/PT) and FAMILY GUY (9:00-9:30/9:30-10:00 PM ET/PT) on Sunday, May 19.

FOX 2013 SEASON FINALE AND SUMMER SCHEDULE

(All times ET/PT except where noted)

MONDAY

Monday, April 29:

8:00-9:00 PM              BONES (Season Finale)

9:00-10:00 PM            THE FOLLOWING (Season Finale)

Monday, May 6:

8:00-9:00 PM              BONES (Encore Episode)

9:00-10:00 PM            BONES (Encore Episode)

Monday, May 13:

8:00-10:00 PM            HELL’S KITCHEN (All-New Special Two-Hour Monday Episode)

Mondays, beginning May 20:

8:00-8:30 PM              RAISING HOPE (Encore)

8:30-9:00 PM              THE GOODWIN GAMES (Series Premiere)

9:00-9:30 PM              NEW GIRL (Encore)

9:30-10:00 PM            THE MINDY PROJECT (Encore)

***************************

TUESDAY

Tuesday, May 7:

8:00-9:00 PM              HELL’S KITCHEN (All-New Episode)

9:00-9:30 PM              NEW GIRL (All-New Episode)

9:30-10:00 PM            THE MINDY PROJECT (All-New Episode)

 

Tuesday, May 14:

8:00-9:00 PM              SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE (One-Hour Season Premiere)

9:00-9:30 PM              NEW GIRL (Season Finale)

9:30-10:00 PM            THE MINDY PROJECT (Season Finale)

 

Tuesdays, beginning May 21:

8:00-10:00 PM            SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE (All-New Episode)

***************************

WEDNESDAY

Wednesday, May 15:

8:00-9:00 PM              AMERICAN IDOL (Season Finale, Part One; ET live/PT tape-delayed)

9:00-10:00 PM            DOES SOMEONE HAVE TO GO (Series Preview)

 

Wednesdays, beginning May 22:

8:00-10:00 PM            MASTERCHEF (Season Premiere)

***************************

THURSDAY

Thursday, May 9:

8:00-9:00 PM              AMERICAN IDOL (All-New; ET live/PT tape-delayed)

9:00-10:00 PM            GLEE (Season Finale)

Thursday, May 16:

8:00-10:07 PM            AMERICAN IDOL (Season Finale, Part Two; ET live/PT tape-delayed)

Thursdays, beginning May 23:

8:00-9:00 PM              DOES SOMEONE HAVE TO GO (Series Premiere)

9:00-10:00 PM            HELL’S KITCHEN (Time Period Premiere)

 

FRIDAY

Friday, April 5:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Encore)

9:00-10:00 PM            TOUCH (All-New)

Fridays, beginning April 12:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Encore Episode)

9:00-10:00 PM            KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Encore Episode)

Fridays, beginning April 26:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (All-New)

9:00-10:00 PM            TOUCH (All-New)

Friday, May 10:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Season Finale)

9:00-10:00 PM            TOUCH (Season Finale)

Friday, May 17:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Encore)

9:00-10:00 PM            BONES (Encore)

Fridays, beginning May 24:

8:00-9:00 PM              KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Encore)

9:00-10:00 PM            THE FOLLOWING (Encore)

***************************

SATURDAY

Saturday, May 4:

8:00-9:00 PM              COPS (One-Hour Season Finale)

9:00-10:00 PM            THE FOLLOWING (Encore)

11:00 PM-12:30 AM   ENCORES

Saturday, May 11:

6:00 PM-CC                NASCAR ON FOX – DARLINGTON 500

11:00 PM-12:30 AM   ENCORES

Saturday, May 18:

8:00-10:00 PM            COPS (Encores)

11:00 PM-12:30 AM   ENCORES

 

Saturdays, beginning May 25:

6:30 PM-CC                FOX SPORTS SATURDAYS: BASEBALL ’13

11:00 PM-12:30 AM   ENCORES

Saturdays, beginning July 27:

6:30 PM-CC                FOX SPORTS SATURDAYS: BASEBALL ’13

11:00 PM-12:30 AM   ANIMATION DOMINATION HIGH-DEF (Series Premiere)

SUNDAYS

Sunday, May 12:

7:00-7:30 PM              THE SIMPSONS (Encore)

7:30-8:00 PM              THE CLEVELAND SHOW (All-New)

8:00-8:30 PM              THE SIMPSONS (All-New)

8:30-9:00 PM              BOB’S BURGERS (Season Finale)

9:00-9:30 PM              FAMILY GUY (All-New)

9:30-10:00 PM            AMERICAN DAD (Season Finale)

Sunday, May 19:

7:00-8:00 PM              THE CLEVELAND SHOW (One-Hour Season Finale; Two All-New Episodes)

8:00-9:00 PM              THE SIMPSONS (One-Hour Season Finale; Two All-New Episodes)

9:00-10:00 PM            FAMILY GUY (One-Hour Season Finale; Two All-New Episodes)

Sunday, May 26:

5:30 PM-CC                NASCAR ON FOX – COCA-COLA 500

Sundays, beginning June 6:

7:00-10:00 PM            ANIMATION DOMINATION (Encores)

[EDITOR’S NOTE: For photos, artwork and more information on FOX primetime, please visit foxflash.com.]

-FOX-

FOX Moves ‘Touch’ Premiere, Makes It Two Hours

Via Press Release:

 “TOUCH” CONNECTS

WITH A SPECIAL TWO-HOUR SEASON TWO PREMIERE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 8, ON FOX

November 28, 2012 – TOUCH, the critically acclaimed adventure drama series starring Emmy Award winner Kiefer Sutherland (“24”), will launch its anticipated second season with a special action-packed two-hour premiere on Friday, Feb. 8 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX.

In Season Two of TOUCH, the dramatic action shifts from New York to Los Angeles, where single father MARTIN BOHM (Sutherland) and his gifted son, JAKE (David Mazouz), are on the run. Their critical mission is to help distraught mother LUCY ROBBINS (Maria Bello, “ER”) find her missing – and equally gifted – daughter AMELIA (newcomer Saxon Sharbino). When it’s discovered that they are all targets of the mysterious and possibly sinister corporation, Aster Corps., the desperate search for Amelia intensifies. Factoring into the unfolding equation is the genius of Aster Corps., CALVIN NORBURG (Lukas Haas, “24”), who’s on the verge of making a career-defining discovery, as well as the extreme religious zealot GUILLERMO ORTIZ (Said Taghmaoui, “G.I. Joe: The Rise of The Cobra”), who stops at nothing to attain his vision. As ominous connections appear, Martin remains determined to uncover a global conspiracy in order to protect his family and save the lives of the innocent.

TOUCH is a production of Chernin Entertainment and Tailwind Productions, in association with 20th Century Fox Television. Tim Kring created the series and wrote the pilot. Kring, Carol Barbee (“Jericho”) Peter Chernin (NEW GIRL, BEN AND KATE), Katherine Pope (NEW GIRL, BEN AND KATE), Kiefer Sutherland and Suzan Bymel (“The War at Home”) are executive producers. Francis Lawrence (“Water for Elephants”) directed the pilot. “Like” TOUCH on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/TOUCHonTV. Follow the series on Twitter @TOUCHonTV and join the discussion at #touch.

-FOX-

FOX: ‘Touch’, ‘American Idol’ And New Kevin Bacon Thriller ‘The Following’ Premiere Dates Announced

Just a note here:  It’s not a coincidence that the Fringe series finale will be on the same night as the season two premiere of Touch.  Also, The Following is moving into the horrible The Mob Doctor‘s timeslot so we assume that it’s been cancelled.  We can’t imagine that they are moving it to another night.

Via Press Release:

FOX ANNOUNCES WINTER PREMIERE DATES 

12TH SEASON OF “AMERICAN IDOL” KICKS OFF WITH

TWO-NIGHT PREMIERE EVENT

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 16, AND THURSDAY, JANUARY 17 

KEVIN WILLIAMSON’S NEW PSYCHOLOGICAL THRILLER “THE FOLLOWING”

STARRING KEVIN BACON AND JAMES PUREFOY

DEBUTS MONDAY, JANUARY 21 

SEASON TWO OF “TOUCH” MAKES CONTACT FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 1 

FOX is announcing the winter season and series premiere dates for new and returning series, including the returns of AMERICAN IDOL and TOUCH, and the debut of new thriller THE FOLLOWING.

Featuring host Ryan Seacrest and new judges Mariah Carey, Nicki Minaj and Keith Urban, along with returning judge Randy Jackson, the 12th season of AMERICAN IDOL begins with the exciting two-night premiere Wednesday, Jan. 16 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) and Thursday, Jan. 17 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT).

THE FOLLOWING, a psychological thriller created by Kevin Williamson (“The Vampire Diaries,” “Dawson’s Creek,” “Scream” franchise) and starring Golden Globe Award-winning actor Kevin Bacon (“X-Men: The Last Stand,” “Frost/Nixon”) and James Purefoy (“Rome”), launches Monday, Jan. 21(9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT). The intense, spellbinding drama follows RYAN HARDY (Bacon), an ex-FBI agent called out of retirement to track down JOE CARROLL (Purefoy), a devious and diabolical serial killer, and the mastermind behind an ever-growing web of killers.

Season Two of TOUCH, starring Emmy Award winner Kiefer Sutherland (“24”), kicks into gear Friday, Feb. 1 (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT). As the action shifts dramatically from New York to Los Angeles, single father MARTIN BOHM (Sutherland) and his gifted son, JAKE (David Mazouz), find themselves at the center of a global conspiracy involving a mother in search of her missing teenage daughter, a mathematical genius and a religious zealot assassinating others with abilities like Jake’s. Joining the cast this season are Maria Bello (“ER”), Lukas Haas (“24”), Said Taghmaoui (“G.I. Joe: The Rise of The Cobra”) and newcomer Saxon Sharbino.

-more- 

FOX WINTER PREMIERE DATES – Page 2

FOX WINTER SEASON AND SERIES PREMIERE DATES

(Times for All-New Episodes are ET/PT Except as Noted)

 

Wednesday, Jan. 16:

8:00-10:00 PM            AMERICAN IDOL (Season Premiere, Part One)

Thursday, Jan. 17:

8:00-9:00 PM              AMERICAN IDOL (Season Premiere, Part Two)

Monday, Jan. 21:

9:00-10:00 PM            THE FOLLOWING (Series Premiere) 

Friday, Feb. 1:

9:00-10:00 PM            TOUCH (Season Premiere)

 

-FOX-

[EDITOR’S NOTE 1:  THE GOODWIN GAMES premiere date will be announced at a later date.]

[EDITOR’S NOTE 2:  For photos and more information on FOX programming, please visit http://www.foxflash.com/d+iv.php/main/page?aID=1.]

FOX: ‘Touch’ Season Two Premiere Pushed Back To January, ‘Kitchen Nightmares’ Return Date Announced

Via Press Release:

KITCHEN NIGHTMARES STARTS COOKING FRIDAY, OCTOBER 26 

SEASON TWO OF “TOUCH” TO DEBUT THIS JANUARY ON FOX

October 4, 2012 – All-new episodes of KITCHEN NIGHTMARES, the unscripted series featuring Chef Gordon Ramsay helping fledging restaurants turn their luck and their businesses around, will start cooking Friday, Oct. 26 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. TOUCH, the critically acclaimed adventure drama starring Emmy Award winner Kiefer Sutherland (“24”) will now have its second season premiere in January 2013(date and time to be announced).

In the fifth season of KITCHEN NIGHTMARES, Gordon Ramsay treks to Brooklyn, Boston, Pittsburgh and the suburbs of Los Angeles and Cleveland, to help struggling restaurants stay afloat. Each week, Chef Ramsay will visit a new establishment with myriad problems. He will delve deep into the inner workings of each eatery and explore everything from unsanitary refrigerators to lazy and inexperienced staff in order to diagnose the real problems. Whether he changes the restaurant’s operations, updates the menu or gives the establishment a complete makeover, Chef Ramsay will do whatever it takes to try and turn these restaurants into popular, successful and, most importantly, money-making businesses. It’s up to the restaurant owners to take his advice and use it – or face closure.

In Season Two of TOUCH, the story setting shifts from New York to Los Angeles, where single father MARTIN BOHM (Kiefer Sutherland) and his gifted son, JAKE (David Mazouz), are on the run from the mysterious and possibly sinister research facility Aster Corps, which had shown tremendous interest in exploiting Jake’s ability to perceive the hidden patterns that connect people around the world. After arriving on the West Coast, the father-son team met distraught mother LUCY ROBBINS (Maria Bello, “ER”) and now are determined to help find her missing – and equally gifted – daughter AMELIA (newcomer Saxon Sharbino). During their search, their paths will cross with Aster Corps’ genius, CALVIN NORBURG (Lukas Haas, “24”), whose rumpled exterior masks his true colors, as well as a complicated and intense religious zealot, GUILLERMO ORTIZ (Said Taghmaoui, “G.I. Joe: The Rise of The Cobra”).

KITCHEN NIGHTMARES is a co-production of ITV Studios America and Optomen in association with A. Smith & Co. Productions, Inc. Arthur Smith, Kent Weed, Patricia Llewellyn and Gordon Ramsay serve as executive producers. “Like” KITCHEN NIGHTMARES on Facebook at www.facebook.com/KitchenNightmares. Follow the series on Twitter @KNonFOX and join the discussion at #kitchennightmares.

TOUCH is a production of Chernin Entertainment and Tailwind Productions, in association with 20thCentury Fox Television. Tim Kring created the series and wrote the pilot. Kring, Carol Barbee (“Jericho”), Peter Chernin, Katherine Pope, Kiefer Sutherland and Suzan Bymel (“The War at Home”) are executive producers. “Like” TOUCH on Facebook at www.facebook.com/TOUCHonTV. Follow the series on Twitter @TOUCHonTV and join the discussion at #touch.

-FOX-

[EDITOR’S NOTE: For more information on KITCHEN NIGHTMARES and TOUCH, please visit http://www.foxflash.com/div.php/main/page?aID=1z2z2z337.]

FOX: ‘Touch’ Renewed… ‘Alcatraz,’ ‘The Finder’ Canceled

Kind of a mixed bag on this one.  We are, of course, thrilled that FOX has announced that they will bring back the Kiefer Sutherland/Tim Kring science fiction series, Touch for a second season.  As we noted in our review, we think Touch is the best new series of the 2012 – 2013 season and it just keeps getting better.

On a more disappointing note, Alcatraz has been canceled as has the Bones spinoff, The Finder.  We loved Alcatraz but we get why it had a hard time finding an audience.  Serialized science fiction revolving mysteries and time-travel just aren’t going to work on a major network.

We liked The Finder, too, and we’re a little surprised that it couldn’t succeed.  It really was just the type of quirky procedural that fans of Bones should have jumped on.

REVIEW: Touch (FOX – Thursday, 9:00 p.m.)

We are all interconnected. Our lives are invisibly tied to those whose destinies touch ours.

This is the hopeful premise of the new drama TOUCH from creator and writer Tim Kring (“Heroes,” “Crossing Jordan”) and executive producers Peter Chernin (NEW GIRL, TERRA NOVA) and Katherine Pope (NEW GIRL, TERRA NOVA).

Blending science, spirituality and emotion, the series will follow seemingly unrelated people all over the world whose lives affect each other in ways seen and unseen, known and unknown. At the story’s center is MARTIN BOHM (Kiefer Sutherland), a widower and single father, haunted by an inability to connect to his emotionally challenged 11-year-old son, JAKE (David Mazouz). Caring, intelligent and thoughtful, Martin has tried everything to reach his son. But Jake never speaks, shows little emotion, and never allows himself to be touched by anyone, including Martin. Jake is obsessed with numbers—writing long strings of them in his ever-present notebooks—and with discarded cell phones.

Social worker CLEA HOPKINS (Gugu Mbatha-Raw) believes that Jake’s needs are too serious for Martin to handle. She sees a man whose life has become dominated by a child he can no longer control. She believes that it’s time for the state to intervene. So Jake is placed in foster care, despite Martin’s desperate objections.

But everything changes after Martin meets ARTHUR TELLER (Danny Glover), a professor and an expert on children who possess special gifts when it comes to numbers. Martin learns that Jake possesses an extraordinary gift—the ability to perceive the seemingly hidden patterns that connect every life on the planet. While Martin wants nothing more than to communicate directly with his son, Jake connects to his father through numbers, not words. Martin realizes that it’s his job to decipher these numbers and recognize their meaning. As he puts the pieces together, he will help people across the world connect as their lives intersect according to the patterns Jake has foreseen.

Martin’s quest to connect with his son will shape humanity’s destiny. – FOX

100 out of 100

For our money, other than ABC’s The River, the Tim Kring/Kiefer Sutherland vehicle Touch was the most anticipated series of the 2011 – 2012 season.  Then, after we saw the pilot event in January, we were incredibly tempted to do what we’re about to do right now but we wanted to wait to see a couple more episodes to maintain at least credibility.  So, after watching four episodes of this series we can now say without any hesitation:

Touch is the best new show of the 2011 – 2012 season… period… end of discussion.

There… we said it and there is no way around it.  As much as we love Homeland, it’s better than even  Homeland.

What we love about this show is… well… just about everything.  Tim Kring has done an absolutely fantastic job of taking an established and complicated Science Fiction subject and making it accessible to all audiences and we’re still trying to wrap our heads around how he’s doing it because it’s the most brilliant job of fooling a non-genre audience into getting involved with a cerebral narrative like we haven’t seen since Lost.

This subject matter, blending theoretical science and the metaphysical, in and of itself is so far beyond even the imagination of most viewers that if not for Tim Kring and Kiefer Sutherland being attached to it, it is unlikely that anyone would even have picked it up. But FOX isn’t stupid and Kevin Reilly recognizes that those two names bring an accessibility to genre like few have been able to do in the last decade.

So, how is Touch finding broad appeal while staying true to its SciFi roots?  Simply put, as the premise states, it’s about making connections.  We have often noted that the key to any show’s success (particularly in drama) is the ability of the characters to relate to the audience.  Touch takes a little bit of a different approach to this.  Since there are really only three or four regular characters that appear on the series from week-to-week, Kring and the producers seem far less concerned about having the characters relate to their audience through character background development than they do through the situational and circumstantial development of every episode.

Now, of course we immediately grow an affinity for Martin and Jake and are sympathetic to them as their back-stories unfold, but what’s magnificent is that there is a new supporting cast of characters every week and we immediately become as fond of them and what they’re going through as we do the Bohms.  The circumstances that all of these characters go through in each episode, regardless of race, creed, color or national origin are all circumstances that every one in the audience can relate to and if you can’t, the person sitting next to you can.  So as the characters on-screen become more interconnected, we, the audience become more connected to them and each other.

There really is a little bit of something for everyone in this show.  For fans of Jack Bauer, Sutherland’s Martin Bohm is kind of like a kinder, gentler version of his character from 24 (sorry, Kiefer… every role you ever get going forward will be compared to the one your most famous for).  He’s a man who’s suffered a lot of pain (losing his wife on 9/11, struggling to take care of his special needs son, giving up his career as a reporter and taking menial jobs just so he could find the time for him) but he’s fanatically dedicated to his little boy, Jake, and from the beginning of the series, we see the gentle side of Martin that Jake, who’s never spoken a word, is able to elicit from his father and that’s what drives Martin every episode to make sense of the numbers.  As a parent, it is very easy to make a connection with the relationship between Martin and Jake and it’s very easy to understand the unquestioning love Martin has for his little boy, despite how frustrating he may be.

Speaking of 24, there’s certainly no shortage of action and suspense every episode and even though we do realistically expect that crisis-[X] is going to work out in the end, the payoff is still satisfying because not only do they give us a great ride along the way, but they manage to slip in a little twist at the end of every episode that ties everything together and completes the circle and it’s based on some innocuous comment that you smack yourself in the head for not noticing when it was mentioned earlier in the episode and it turns out to be the most important connection of all.

Touch also has the distinction of being one of the few shows on television that as intense as it is, you can feel comfortable watching it with your kids regardless of their age. There is very little violence on this show, there’s no sex, and the language never goes above the PG level. Sure, there are big-issue themes in this series that a five year-old isn’t going to understand (however, as has happened in our house already, those themes might just inspire curiosity from little kids and open up a dialogue), but you don’t have to worry about having to quickly change the channel because the kids heard or saw something that you’d rather they hadn’t until they were in their mid-20’s.  And that’s the thing with Touch; it’s so good all the way around that it doesn’t have to resort to crutches to tell a compelling yarn from week-to-week.

This a story about the human condition and our very existence.  Why are we here?  What is our destiny? The point that we’ve taken from the show is that all people have the propensity for doing good in this world and because of that we are all connected and it’s only when we see the connections that we can be liberated from the cynical chains of ego, greed, envy, anger and hatred that serve to bind us.  This show is about good people doing good things, not for their own personal gain, but because it’s the right thing to do.  It’s called piety for piety’s sake, i.e., doing the right thing because it’s the right thing, not because you expect to be rewarded for it.  Socrates spoke at length about it… so did Gene Roddenberry. The message is poignant and uplifting and it’s done in such a heart-warming and endearing way that it’s nearly impossible not to get misty-eyed by the end of each episode.

Normally we’d just immediately direct you to FOX’s website to watch full episodes, but FOX has changed things up and is making viewers sign into their cable or satellite provider’s website to have full-access so you can do that by going here and following the directions or you can just go to Hulu and watch the SD versions with no hassle.

March Madness Begins! New Show Premieres And Returning Favorites For Spring (Awake, Touch, Community, More…)

We’re doing something a little different this time because it’s been a couple of months since our last programming update and there have been some changes since then announced so it just doesn’t make sense for us to keep updating a piece we did back in January.

So here’s a complete list (at least as complete as we can get, currently) of all the new and returning shows coming in March and April.

Thursday March 1st

NBC     10:00 p.m.     Awake     YES! – STAFF PICK

Awake simply has so much going for it.  It stars Jason Isaacs who we think is great in everything he does plus it’s a compelling detective drama with a SciFi, metaphysical twist and it’s one of those shows like Lost where audiences will already be invested in it before they even realize it’s a SciFi show.  We have seen the pilot already and are very excited for this show.  We hope NBC is smart enough to promote the crap out of it, because if they don’t, it’s going to disappear as quickly as it premieres.

Below is the extended trailer, if you want to see the entire pilot episode ahead of the premiere click here!

Sunday March 4th

A&E     10:00 p.m.     Breakout Kings     YES!

We loved this better-than-average unique procedural when it aired last spring and if the damned DVR hadn’t crapped out, we would have seen more than the first four episodes. The upside is that it’ll be on Netflix streaming soon and the discs will be available in March 13th.  Great show, has a bit of an arc to it, but if that’s not your thing you won’t have to worry about getting lost if you miss an a episode here and there.

ABC     10:00 p.m.     GCB     NO!

FKA, Good Christian Bitches, FKA Good Christian Belles, all we can say is way-to-go in “let’s-alienate-78%-of-our-audience-before-a-single-episode-has-aired-with-the-title-alone” department, ABC.  Despite this, however, just watch the trailer to figure out on your own what a total sh*tfest this is going to be.  That combined with the fact that it’s an idiotic soap that’s trying to clone Desperate Housewives in order to pick up the mantle after it ends this Spring, provides a compelling enough reason for us to never watch it.  That being said, we’re sure it’s going to be massive a hit for that crowd.

Tuesday March 6th

Breaking In     9:30 p.m.     YES! – STAFF PICK

Against all odds, Breaking In has done what only one other show in the history of television has done: it was renewed after being canceled, not once, but twice.  If history has shown us anything, maybe that’s a good spot to be in considering that the only other show to hold that distinction is Family Guy.  We absolutely loved Breaking In (our favorite new comedy of last season) when it came out last Spring and after it was cancelled in May and rumors immediately started flying that FOX was looking for a way to work something out with Sony to bring it back, we predicted that the rumors were probably true and that it probably would happen despite what many of the other outlets claimed.  Of course, we were right and it looks as if FOX is reading our blog because they permanently moved Breaking In to the bottom of the hour slot post-Raising Hope instead of the top of the hour post-Idol.  With Will and Grace‘s Megan Mullally joining the regular cast, let’s hope it can keep the ratings up and get picked up for a third season.

Thursday March 15th

ABC     8:00 p.m.     Missing     YES!

Mixed emotions on this.  Spies, non-stop action, Ashley Judd… what’s not to love, right? We thought so, too, but then we noticed the timeslot and we’re slightly concerned over the description of the plot and it’s very clichéd nature.  The timeslot is an issue because at 8:00 p.m., you can expect a very watered-down show.  Still looks great, though.

NBC     8:00 p.m.     Community     YES!

Community finally comes back for another semester to the delight of fans everywhere. We knew it would, but nobody seemed to believe us.  The question is whether or not it will survive and get picked up again for next year.  We certainly hope so.

 

Monday March 19th

FOX     9:00 p.m.     Touch     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: Kiefer Sutherland returns to television with Danny Glover in this fantastic looking, high-concept, SciFi drama from Tim Kring, the creator of Heroes.  If you saw the pilot on January 25th, we don’t need to tell you how good this show is.  We are predicting that this will be the best new show of the 2011 – 2012 season… yes, even better than Showtime’s Homeland.

Sunday March 25th

AMC     9:00 p.m.     Mad Men     YES!

After an obnoxiously long hiatus reminiscent of The Sopranos, the 1960’s throwback period-piece that put AMC on the map as a player in the dramatic television game is back for its fifth season.  If you haven’t done it already, you can still catch up with the first four seasons on Netflix streaming.

Sunday April 1st

AMC     10:00 p.m.     The Killing     YES! – STAFF PICK

AMC doubles-down on their hit The Killing, a show that either you got or you didn’t.  We did and appropriately gave it a rare perfect score for its first season, especially, and not in spite of the twist-ending in the season finale.  For all of the haters out there that are still pissed because they didn’t wrap up the season in the nice and tidy, vanilla, generic and clichéd way that you expected them to because you’ve been so numbed by bad American police procedurals, don’t worry, the producers have assured us that Rosie Larsen’s murderer will be revealed this season …you big babies.

ALERT! 2012 Midseason Network And Cable Schedule! UPDATED!

In the interest of continuing to be relevant and to give you news when you actually need it and not a month in advance, we decided not to publish the complete midseason schedules for all the networks when they came out last month and instead, just give you the highlights now so you can set your DVR’s accordingly or make sure that you avoid a crappy show.  The upside is that most of the shows this midseason look even better than what we got in the Fall.

Tuesday January 3rd 

ABC     8:30 p.m.     Work It     NO!

The Tastic says: As we noted in our preview, this looks like it could possibly be one of the worst shows in television history.  Save your soul, do no watch this.

ABC     9:00 p.m.     Celebrity Wife Swap     YES!

The Tastic says: OK… honesty time.  We have to admit that we have our guilty pleasures and most of them revolve around reality shows on VH1, E! and ABC.  We actually like the dopey Wife Swap and throwing Gary Busey into the mix can only be a good thing.  Here’s a corny music video promoting the series.  Like we said… guilty pleasure.

Friday January 6th

SyFy     10:00 p.m.     Merlin     YES!

The Tastic says: We love Science Fiction but Fantasy has never really been our bag.  That being said, we have seen a few episodes of Merlin over the years and it’s good to see it’s back for the fans of the series.

Sunday January 8th

NBC     9:00 p.m.     The Firm     YES!

The Tastic says: As skeptical as we are about reboots especially when the source material is 20 years-old, we have to admit, this looks pretty good and it’s also nice to see Battlestar Galactica‘s Tricia Helfer getting work.  From what we can tell, John Grisham appears to have complete control over this so that’s got to be a good thing.  NOTE: This is a two-hour premiere on this night only.   The Firm‘s regular timeslot will be on Thursdays at 10:00 p.m. beginning on January 12th.

Wednesday January 11th

NBC      8:30 p.m.     Are You There, Chelsea?     NO!

The Tastic says: Originally titled, Are You There Vodka?  It’s Me, Chelsea… based on the best-selling book by Chelsea Handler of the same name, we originally kinda-sorta recommended this thinking that it could go either way. Upon further review, it really looks like a complete piece of sh*t.

SyFy     10:00 p.m.  Face Off     YES!

The Tastic says: Part guilty pleasure, partly just a love for the craft, we can’t wait for new episodes of the SyFy reality series, Face Off to return.  Good stuff, indeed.

Thursday January 12th

CBS     8:30 p.m.     ¡Rob!     NO!

The Tastic says: F*cking seriously???

FOX     9:00 p.m.     The Finder     YES!

The Tastic says: A spinoff of Bones that looks a lot more interesting than Bones ever has been.

Sunday January 15th

FOX     8:30 p.m.     Napoleon Dynamite     NO!

The Tastic says: As we’ve noted before, Napoleon Dynamite was only mildly entertaining when it first came out in 2004 and now it’s just completely dated and irrelevant.  Again, there’s a reason FOX only ordered six episodes of this.

Monday January 16th

FOX     8:00 p.m.     Alcatraz     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: The highly anticipated new series from J.J. Abrams looks like it’s finally going to give us our Lost fix that we’ve been jonesing for for so long.  Seriously, does anyone think that this doesn’t look absolutely fantastic?  NOTE:  This is a two-hour premiere episode.  The show’s normal timeslot will be on Mondays at 9:00 p.m.

SyFy     9:00 p.m.     Being Human     YES!

The Tastic says: We loved the first season despite all of the critics who continued to have to compare it to its BBC counterpart and took a dump on it.  We can’t wait for season two.

SyFy     10:00 p.m.     Lost Girl     YES!

The Tastic says: This popular Canadian import makes its debut on SyFy and we have to say, it looks pretty damned good.

Tuesday January 17th

F/X     10:00 p.m.     Justified     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: One of the best shows on television, Justified, returns for its third season.

Wednesday January 18th

F/X     10:00 p.m.     Archer     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: The funniest show on television, animated or otherwise, is back for a third season.  The first season is available on Netflix streaming and we highly recommend that you check it out if you’ve never seen it before.

F/X     10:30 p.m.     Unsupervised     YES!

The Tastic says: OK, so the trailer doesn’t look that great but it’s from the producers of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia and Archer so we’re willing to give it a shot.

Wednesday January 25th

FOX     9:00 p.m.     Touch     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: Kiefer Sutherland returns to television with Danny Glover in this fantastic looking, high-concept, Science Fiction drama from Tim Kring, the creator of Heroes.   We are so looking forward to this.  NOTE: This is a special “preview event” broadcast date for Touch. It will air in its regular timeslot beginning on Monday, March 19th.

Friday January 27th

Starz     10:00 p.m.     Spartacus: Vengeance     YES!

The Tastic says: We haven’t had a chance to really get into this series but from we’ve seen of it, we’ve liked it.  We also like when a series gives its season a name instead of a number (this is Spartacus’ third season, by the way.).

Sunday January 29th

HBO     9:00 p.m.     Luck     YES!

The Tastic says: So, we got to see the pilot of Luck when they gave a sneak preview of it back at the end of November and it annoyed the piss out of us as it was confusing as Hell if you don’t know anything about horse racing/betting.  Despite that, it was still really well-done and it has an all-star cast that includes Dustin Hoffmann, Nick Nolte and Dennis Farina.

Monday February 6th

NBC     10:00 p.m.     Smash     YES!

The Tastic says: NBC gets their Glee, albeit a lot more dramatical.  Here’s the thing about Smash:  it looks good but it’s going to wind up in the bottom of our viewing list and probably sit there until the summer because there is just too much for us to keep with considering all of the other shows that either look a lot better or that we already know are a lot better.

Tuesday February 7th

ABC     9:00 p.m.     The River     YES! – STAFF PICK

The Tastic says: This is by far the best looking show of this entire television season.  Talk about getting our Lost-freak on, this show looks like it does that and then some.  CAN. NOT. WAIT.

Sunday February 12th

AMC     9:00 p.m.     The Walking Dead     YES! – STAFF PICK

For those who didn’t already know, this will begin the second half of the second season.  We also have some more news for TWD fans, right here, as well as news for Mad Men and The Killing.


Sunday February 19th

HBO     10:00 p.m.     Eastbound and Down     YES!

The Tastic says: This show is absolutely hilarious and it has been under the radar for two straight seasons.  We’re looking forward to more hijinks in season three.


Sunday March 4th

ABC     10:00 p.m.     GCB     NO!

FKA, Good Christian Bitches, FKA Good Christian Belles, all we can say is way-to-go in “let’s-alienate-78%-of-our-audience-before-a-single-episode-has-aired-with-the-title alone” department, ABC.  Despite this, however, just watch the trailer to figure out on your own what a total sh*tfest this is going to be.  That combined with the fact that it’s an idiotic soap that’s trying to clone Desperate Housewives in order to pick up the mantle after it ends this Spring, provides a compelling enough reason for us to never watch it.  That being said, we’re sure it’s going to be massive hit for that crowd.

Thursday March 15th

ABC     8:00 p.m.     Missing     YES!

Mixed emotions on this.  Spies, non-stop action, Ashley Judd… what’s not to love, right?  We thought so, too, but then we noticed the timeslot and we’re slightly concerned over the description of the plot and it’s very clichéd nature.  The timeslot is an issue because at 8:00 p.m., you can expect a very watered-down show.  Still looks great, though.

FIRST LOOK: Touch – New Science Fiction Drama From Tim Kring Starring Kiefer Sutherland and Danny Glover

We’ve been looking forward to news about the new Tim Kring (Heroes) series starring Kiefer Sutherland, Touch since we first heard about it back in April.  At the time it seemed interesting, albeit a little vague so we didn’t know quite what to make of it.  Well, FOX has now released a first-look trailer and it looks fantastic.

Touch is set to debut in early 2012.

Show Description:

From writer/creator Tim Kring (HeroesCrossing Jordan) and executive producers Peter Chernin (TERRA NOVA) and Katherine Pope (TERRA NOVA) comes TOUCH, a preternatural drama in which science and spirituality intersect with the hopeful premise that we are all interconnected, tied in invisible ways to those whose lives we are destined to alter and impact.

Through masterful storytelling, the series follows a group of seemingly unrelated characters – beginning with a former firefighter tormented by his inability to save a dying woman, an Iraqi teenager who will go to great risks to help his family, a gifted singer whose actions at a karaoke bar save lives thousands of miles away and a British businessman desperately trying to retrieve a key piece of information from his lost mobile phone – who affect each other in ways seen and unseen. 

At the center is MARTIN BOHM (Kiefer Sutherland, 24), a widower and single father, haunted by an inability to connect to his mute, severely autistic 11-year-old son, JAKE. Caring, intelligent and thoughtful, Martin has tried everything to reach his son who shows little emotion and never allows himself to be touched by anyone, including Martin. Jake busies himself with cast-off cell phones, disassembling them and manipulating the parts, allowing him to see the world in his own special way. 

After multiple failed attempts at keeping Jake in school, Martin is visited by social worker CLEA HOPKINS, who insists on doing an evaluation of the Bohms’ living situation. Although new at her job, Clea sees a man whose life has become dominated by a child he can no longer control. She believes his attempts to communicate with Jake are just wish fulfillment, and determines that it’s time for the state to intervene. But everything changes when Martin discovers that Jake possesses a gift of staggering genius – the ability to see things that no one else can, the patterns that connect everything. Jake is indeed communicating after all. But it’s not with words, it’s with numbers. And now he needs Martin to decipher their meaning and connect these numbers to the cast of seemingly unrelated characters whose lives they affect. 

Along the way, Martin will be guided by BORIS PODOLSKY, a discredited aging professor who offers Martin a compelling but unorthodox theory about Jake and his rare ability. Whether it be chance, coincidence, timing, synergy or fate, there are events that touch us all, as part of an interconnected, dazzlingly precise universe. – FOX

Meet FOX’s New Shows For 2011 – 2012 (VIDEOS!)… And Watch How We Tear Them Apart (Preview – Review)

FOX announced their primetime 2011 – 2012 schedule earlier ahead of their press release at the upfront advertising event and we have all the information posted right here.  What we unfortunately didn’t get was nice little neat synopses of all the new shows that will be gracing our living rooms in 2011 – 2012.  So, a little while later, FOX obliged and issued an actual press release announcing the schedule and issuing those nice little synopses we like so much here.  They certainly make out life easier when we have to do the layouts for the reviews so we can tell you how awful they are.

"The 'Tastic Says... YOU FAIL!"

We aren’t going to publish the whole Press Release because it’s ridiculously long and we already published the schedule.  We’re just going to publish the synopses and critique them, TV-Tastic-Style but if you must read the whole thing, you can just go here.

Via Press Release:

FOX 2011-2012 PRIMETIME SCHEDULE

NEW SERIES SYNOPSES

The new unscripted series launching this fall is:

The X Factor

Simon Cowell returns to FOX in the award-winning international phenomenon The X Factor. This new competition series, hosted by Nicole Scherzinger and Steve Jones, gives viewers the opportunity to help choose the next global superstar or breakout music group. The X Factor judges will travel the nation searching for undiscovered talent 12 years old or over – both solo artists and vocal groups – who are willing to brave the panel for a chance to make their dreams come true. Auditions for The X Factor were held this spring in Los Angeles, CA; Miami, FL; Newark, NJ; Seattle, WA; Chicago, IL; and Dallas, TX. In a departure from other singing competition series, the first time a contestant auditions for judges Simon Cowell, Antonio “L.A.” Reid, Cheryl Cole and Paula Abdul, he/she will do so in front of an audience of thousands – raising the stakes and increasing the pressure to impress not only the judges, but also a potential legion of fans. This will be the ultimate test to prove they have the vocal ability, charisma and stage presence it takes to become a global superstar or breakout music act and win a $5 million recording contract with Syco/Sony Music. Those contestants who survive the first auditions graduate to “boot camp” and will be divided into four categories. Each category will be mentored by one of the show’s judges. Not only is it a competition between the hopefuls to stake their claim for the coveted win, but it’s also a showdown among the judges as to whose acts will dominate the competition and make it to the finals. The judges may have their say in how the competition progresses, but it will be up to America to decide who ultimately has The X Factor.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: Syco Television, FremantleMedia North America
EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Simon Cowell, Rob Wade, Siobhan Greene, Cecile Frot-Coutaz, Richard Holloway, Andrew Llinares

JUDGES: Simon Cowell, Antonio “L.A.” Reid, Cheryl Cole, Paula Abdul

HOSTS: Nicole Scherzinger, Steve Jones

The ‘Tastic Says:   Gee, We wonder if this show is going to be a hit.  Let’s be honest, this show is going to print its own money and since it’s got both Simon Cowell and now, Paula Abdul, well, there’s finally a singing competition worth our time again on FOX and as we all go to he mall and have to spend our X-Factor dollars with Simon Cowell’s face on them, we will say thank you, sir.

The following new comedies will premiere this fall on FOX:

I Hate My Teenage Daughter (working title)

I HATE MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER (working title) is a new multi-camera comedy about two best friends who are single moms struggling to raise their difficult and over-privileged teenage daughters. ANNIE (Emmy Award winner Jaime Pressly, “My Name Is Earl”) and NIKKI (Tony Award winner Katie Finneran, “Wonderfalls”) are former high school outcasts whose pasts inform their current parenting styles. Annie, who was raised in an ultra-strict, über-religious household where she had little-to-no freedom, pretty much allows her daughter, SOPHIE (Kristi Lauren, “You”), to do whatever she wants. Nikki, once an unpopular, overweight social pariah, has reinvented herself as a pretty Southern belle whose top priority is providing her daughter, MACKENZIE (Aisha Dee, “Dead Gorgeous”), with the childhood she never had. Sophie and Mackenzie are also best friends, which leads to a lot of co-parenting for Annie and Nikki. They have given the girls everything they asked for and everything they never had: clothes, money and self-esteem. The unintended consequence is they have created two mean girls just like the ones who tortured them years ago. Sophie finds her mother embarrassing and mocks her at every opportunity, but she secretly needs her mom and knows that her behavior is not always appropriate. Mackenzie, on the other hand, is the more manipulative of the daughters – she knows how to work her mother’s insecurities to her benefit. Annie’s ex-husband, MATT (Eric Sheffer Stevens, “As The World Turns”), wants to be a good parent, but is too clueless to know what that even means. That leaves his brother, JACK (Kevin Rahm, “Desperate Housewives,” “Judging Amy”), an attractive, high-powered attorney, to serve as more of a father figure for Sophie. Jack’s meddling would annoy Annie more if she didn’t have such a crush on him. GARY (Chad Coleman, “The Wire”), Nikki’s ex, also tries to help raise his challenging daughter, but the couple’s complicated relationship often makes his involvement more difficult. As their daughters begin to experience their first high school dances and other life-changing teen events, Annie and Nikki are often reminded of their own tortured adolescent years. But when Sophie and Mackenzie’s mean-girl antics cross the line, the moms quickly realize that they must, for the first time, dole out some real punishment and fix what is broken. They have no idea how to do that, but they do know one thing: They can’t do it without each other.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: Warner Bros. Television, Bonanza Productions Inc.

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Sherry Bilsing-Graham, Ellen Kreamer, Andy Ackerman

WRITERS: Sherry Bilsing-Graham, Ellen Kreamer

DIRECTOR: Andy Ackerman

CAST: Jaime Pressly as Annie Watson, Katie Finneran as Nikki Miller, Kristi Lauren as Sophie, Aisha Dee as Mackenzie, Eric Sheffer Stevens as Matt, Kevin Rahm as Jack, Chad Coleman as Gary.

The ‘Tastic Says: We hate comedies anyway and they are usually pretty horrible on FOX to begin with.  Unlike Raising HopeTraffic Light, and Breaking In, this show doesn’t seem like an exception.  Sorry, but bratty teenage-girl bullies just don’t appeal to us nor do clichéd sitcoms. This show hasn’t aired a single episode and we already hate all of the characters. Also, is that the set from Becker?

New Girl (working title)

NEW GIRL (working title) is a new single-camera comedy from Liz Meriwether (“No Strings Attached”) that features a young ensemble cast and takes a fresh and outrageous look at modern male/female relationships. JESS DAY (Zooey Deschanel, “(500) Days of Summer”) is an offbeat and adorable girl in her late 20s who, after a bad breakup, moves in with three single guys. Goofy, positive, vulnerable and honest to a fault, Jess has faith in people, even when she shouldn’t. Although she’s dorky and awkward, she’s comfortable in her own skin. More prone to friendships with women, she’s not used to hanging with the boys – especially at home. Of the three male roommates, NICK (Jake Johnson, “No Strings Attached”) is the most grounded. He had big plans for life, but somewhere along the way, he stopped caring and became a bartender. Usually the smartest guy in the room, he has an uncanny knack for reading people and uses humor to deflect everyone and everything. SCHMIDT (Max Greenfield, “Ugly Betty”) is a hustling young professional who fancies himself a modern-day Casanova. Though his heart is usually in the right place, he’s always scheming ways to climb the social ladder and is driven by an immature and almost obsessive urge to be on “the scene.” Viewing Jess as a gateway into the elusive female mind, as well as a personal project, Schmidt encourages the guys to bring Jess into the apartment. The third roommate, COACH (Damon Wayans Jr., “The Underground”), is a former high school athlete who currently makes his living as a personal trainer. Set in his ways and with a take-it-or-leave-it attitude to dating, Coach is most comfortable when he’s in the gym. Though he’ll never admit it, Coach’s macho athletic exterior is actually a cover for his shyness around women, and he struggles to translate his personal confidence into conversation, preferring to speak in sports metaphors – or not at all. Rounding out this group is Jess’ childhood best friend, CECE (Hannah Simone, “Beautiful People”), a deadpan, somewhat cynical model who blossomed after outgrowing her promiscuous adolescent years. She has the street smarts Jess lacks and spends a lot of time doling out no-nonsense relationship advice that only a professional model could give. She and Jess balance each other well and accept each other despite their faults, making Cece the perfect complement to Jess. As their relationships progress, the five friends come to realize they need each other more than they ever thought they would and end up forming a charmingly dysfunctional family.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: 20th Century Fox Television, Chernin Entertainment

CREATOR/WRITER: Liz Meriwether

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Liz Meriwether, Jake Kasdan, Peter Chernin, Katherine Pope, Dave Finkel, Brett Baer

DIRECTOR: Jake Kasdan

CAST: Zooey Deschanel as Jess, Max Greenfield as Schmidt, Jake Johnson as Nick, Hannah Simone as Cece, Damon Wayans Jr. as Coach

The ‘Tastic Says: At the risk of repeating ourselves, we hate comedies anyway and they are usually pretty horrible on FOX to begin with.  This show actually doesn’t look absolutely horrible (actually it looks kind of sweet and endearing), but it’s just not our cup of tea.  But then, again, we were dead-wrong on Raising Hope so we’ll give it a shot despite that it’s got that My Boys vibe to it.

The new animated comedy joining the FOX schedule this fall is:

Allen Gregory

ALLEN GREGORY is a new animated comedy series that tells the story of one of the most pretentious 7-year-olds of our time. When he looks in the mirror, ALLEN GREGORY DE LONGPRE (Jonah Hill, “Superbad,” “Get Him to the Greek”) doesn’t see a child. He sees a young man who is intelligent, sophisticated, worldly, artistic and romantic – characteristics he inherited from his doting father, RICHARD (French Stewart, “Private Practice,” “3rdRock from the Sun”). The pair share an extraordinary father-son bond – a bond that is sometimes annoyingly interrupted by Richard’s life partner, JEREMY (Nat Faxon, The Cleveland Show, “Reno 911!”), for whom Allen Gregory has minimal respect, if any at all. They live together in a stunning architectural loft, along with JULIE (Joy Osmanski, “Grey’s Anatomy”), Allen Gregory’s adopted Cambodian sister. Although Allen Gregory has allegedly composed operas, written novels and dated Chloë Sevigny, he’s about to embark on his greatest challenge yet: leaving the safety of his father’s homeschooling and attending elementary school with children his own age. His journey will be a struggle, not only with the other kids at school, but with the faculty as well. Whether it’s the all-out rivalry with GINA WINTHROP (guest voice Leslie Mann, “Funny People”), his by-the-book second grade teacher; his unique relationship with JUDITH GOTTLIEB (guest voice Renée Taylor, “How I Met Your Mother”), his 68-year-old principal; or his desperate desire to be best friends with JOEL ZADAK (guest voice Jake Johnson, “Get Him to the Greek”), the school’s popular stud, Allen Gregory has his work cut out for him. With the help of his trusty friend and assistant, PATRICK VANDERWEEL (Cristina Pucelli, “Finley the Fire Engine”); and the support of SUPERINTENDENT STEWART ROSSMYRE (Will Forte, “Saturday Night Live”), who believes the De Longpres are a tremendous asset to the school, Allen Gregory won’t have to get his hands too dirty. ALLEN GREGORY is about an outsider. And while he may put on a tough exterior, deep down, all Allen Gregory wants is to fit in. Well, that, and for Julie to run away and never be seen or heard from again. And Jeremy too.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: 20th Century Fox Television, Chernin Entertainment

CREATORS: Jonah Hill, Andrew Mogel, Jarrad Paul

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jonah Hill, Andrew Mogel, Jarrad Paul, Peter Chernin, Katherine Pope, David A. Goodman

VOICE CAST: Jonah Hill as Allen Gregory De Longpre, Nat Faxon as Jeremy, French Stewart as Richard, Joy Osmanski as Julie, Cristina Pucelli as Patrick, Will Forte as Superintendent Rossmyre

GUEST VOICE CAST: Leslie Mann as Ms. Winthrop, Jake Johnson as Joel, Renée Taylor as Principal Gottlieb

The ‘Tastic Says: There’s a reason FOX only ordered seven episodes of this. It looks absolutely horrific but the one promising thing that we can say is that at least it’s animated and we won’t have to look at Jonah Hill. Seriously, did someone at FOX just say, “Hey, look… a Stewie Griffin knock-off!  That will make a good show for the idiotic masses on Sunday night! Hell, they’re still watching Bob’s Burgers and The Cleveland Show aren’t they?”

The following new drama will debut this Fall on FOX:

Terra  Nova

From executive producers Steven Spielberg (“Saving Private Ryan,” “Jurassic Park”), Peter Chernin, René Echevarria (“Castle,” “The 4400”) and Brannon Braga (“24”) comes an epic family adventure 85 million years in the making. TERRA NOVA follows an ordinary family on an incredible journey back in time to prehistoric Earth as a small part of a daring experiment to save the human race. In the year 2149, the world is dying. The planet is overdeveloped and overcrowded, with the majority of plant and animal life extinct. The future of mankind is in jeopardy, and its only hope for survival is in the distant past. When scientists at the FERMI Particle Accelerator unexpectedly discovered a fracture in time that made it possible to construct a portal into primeval history, the bold notion was born to resettle humanity in the past – a second chance to rebuild civilization and get it right this time. The series centers on the Shannon family as they join the Tenth Pilgrimage of settlers to Terra Nova, the first colony established in this beautiful yet foreboding land. JIM SHANNON (Jason O’Mara, “Life on Mars”), a devoted father with a checkered past, guides his family through this new world of limitless beauty, mystery and terror. Jim’s wife, ELISABETH (Shelley Conn, “Mistresses”), is a trauma surgeon and the newest addition to Terra Nova’s medical team. JOSH (Landon Liboiron, “Degrassi: The Next Generation”) is their 17-year-old son who is angry to leave life as he knows it behind; upon arriving at the settlement, he finds himself instantly drawn to the beautiful and rule-breaking SKYE (Allison Miller, “Kings”). MADDY (Naomi Scott, “Life Bites”), Josh’s endearingly awkward 15-year-old sister, hopes Terra Nova will give her a chance to reinvent herself. Although Elisabeth’s medical training secured the family a spot on the pilgrimage, a secret involving their five-year-old daughter, ZOE (newcomer Alana Mansour), soon endangers their place in this utopia. Upon the Shannons’ arrival, they are introduced to COMMANDER NATHANIEL TAYLOR (Stephen Lang, “Avatar”), the charismatic and heroic first pioneer and leader of the settlement. Taylor warns the travelers that while Terra Nova is a place of new opportunities and fresh beginnings, all is not as idyllic as it initially appears. Along with blue skies, towering waterfalls and lush vegetation, the surrounding terrain is teeming with danger – and not just of the man-eating dinosaur variety. There is also a splinter colony of renegades led by the battle-hardened MIRA (Christine Adams, “TRON: Legacy”), who is vehemently opposed to Taylor and his leadership. Even more threatening than what lies outside the protective walls of the colony is the chilling possibility that something sinister is happening inside Terra Nova. The Shannons will come to suspect that not everyone on this mission has the same idea of how to best save mankind; in fact, there may be forces intent on destroying this new world before it even begins.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: 20th Century Fox Television, Chernin Entertainment, DreamWorks Television, Kapital Entertainment

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Steven Spielberg, Peter Chernin, René Echevarria, Brannon Braga, Alex Graves (pilot), Jon Cassar, Aaron Kaplan, Katherine Pope, Justin Falvey, Darryl Frank, Craig Silverstein, Kelly Marcel

DIRECTOR: Alex Graves

CAST: Jason O’Mara as Jim Shannon, Stephen Lang as Nathaniel Taylor, Shelley Conn as Elisabeth Shannon, Landon Liboiron as Josh Shannon, Naomi Scott as Maddy Shannon, Alana Mansour as Zoe Shannon, Christine Adams as Mira, Allison Miller as Skye.

The ‘Tastic Says: *sigh* We love everything about this, we just don’t think it has a snowball’s chance in Terra Nova to survive.  FOX must know that epic SciFi on Network Television is dead and buried.  Heck, they won’t even acknowledge that it is a SciFi show.  Notice how they are calling it an “epic family adventure”  Brannon Braga went so far as to say, “It’s really about this frontier family trying to survive.” Sure it is.  This is the most expensive show in television history.  We’re concerned that it could be disastrous for FOX.

The two new dramas set to debut midseason are:

The Finder

Iraq war veteran WALTER SHERMAN (Geoff Stults, “She’s Out of My League”) gained a reputation while serving in the Army Military Police as someone who was very good at tracking down insurgents, deserters and improvised explosive devices (IEDs). Unfortunately, Walter found one IED just moments before it found him. Two months later, when Walter woke from his coma, he earned an honorable discharge and returned home. His resulting brain damage from the explosion transformed him from someone skilled at recovering people and things into something much more extraordinary: a Finder. From the creator of the hit series Bones comes THE FINDER, the new one-hour procedural centering on a remarkable man who uses his unique gift to help others recover what they’ve lost. Walter may have left the military, but his reputation as a discreet professional who can unearth anything and anyone has been passed on to generals, politicians and other powerful figures. His first post-military assignment was to find the CIA head honcho’s missing daughter and bring her home. Walter did both, and since then has never been without an assignment. After settling in Key West, Walter met the beautiful and worldly IKE LATULIPPE (Saffron Burrows, “Law & Order: Criminal Intent”), a woman with a mysterious past and many hidden skills. She tends bar at The Ends of the Earth, which also serves as a makeshift office and home base for Walter. Walter helped Ike escape a dangerous life, and for that, she is eternally grateful. Another island denizen dedicated to Walter is LEO KNOX (Michael Clarke Duncan, “The Green Mile”), once an obese lawyer who, after the deaths of his wife and children, completely reinvented himself into a gentle giant, philosopher and Walter’s legal advisor. Because of his skills, Walter is often asked to find a person or a thing that law enforcement either will not or cannot find. With the help of Ike and Leo, as well as a patchwork of indebted connections, he and his team ultimately find meaning in their own lives by finding something or someone other people have lost.

PRODUCTION COMPANY: 20th Century Fox Television

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Hart Hanson, Dan Sackheim, Barry Josephson

WRITER: Hart Hanson

DIRECTOR: Dan Sackheim

CAST: Geoff Stults as Walter Sherman, Michael Clarke Duncan as Leo Knox, Saffron Burrows as Ike Latulippe.

The ‘Tastic Says: We’re not fans of Bones.  It’s not bad, it’s just a vanilla procedural. The Finder, however, seems quite interesting.  We’re always willing to give a procedural a shot when they put a unique twist on it.  This reminds of the A&E hit, The Glades.

Alcatraz

From executive producer J.J. Abrams (FRINGE, “Lost,” “Star Trek” and the upcoming “Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol” and “Super 8”) and writer and executive producer Elizabeth Sarnoff (“Lost,” “Deadwood”) comes ALCATRAZ, the chilling new thriller centered on America’s most infamous prison and one-time home to the nation’s most notorious murderers, rapists, kidnappers, thieves and arsonists. When San Francisco Police Department DET. REBECCA MADSEN (Sarah Jones, “Sons Of Anarchy”) is assigned to a grisly homicide case, a fingerprint leads her to a shocking suspect: JACK SYLVANE (guest star Jeffrey Pierce, “The Nine”), a former Alcatraz inmate who died decades ago. Given her family history – both her grandfather and surrogate uncle, RAY ARCHER (Robert Forster, “Jackie Brown”), were guards at the prison – Madsen’s interest is immediately piqued, and once the enigmatic, knows-everything-but-tells-nothing government agent EMERSON HAUSER (Sam Neill, “Jurassic Park”) tries to impede her investigation, she’s doggedly committed. Madsen turns to Alcatraz expert and comic book enthusiast, DR. DIEGO “DOC” SOTO (Jorge Garcia, “Lost”), to piece together the inexplicable sequence of events. The twosome discovers that Sylvane is not only alive, but he’s loose on the streets of San Francisco, leaving bodies in his wake. And strangely, he hasn’t aged a day since he was in Alcatraz, when the prison was ruled by the iron-fisted WARDEN EDWIN JAMES (Jonny Coyne, “Undercovers”) and the merciless ASSOCIATE WARDEN E.B. TILLER (Jason Butler Harner, “The Changeling”). Madsen and Soto reluctantly team with Agent Hauser and his technician, LUCY BANERJEE (Parminder Nagra, “ER”), to stop Sylvane’s vengeful killing spree. By delving into Alcatraz history, government cover-ups and Rebecca’s own heritage, the team will ultimately discover that Sylvane is only a small part of a much larger, more sinister present-day threat. For while he may be the first, it quickly becomes clear that Sylvane won’t be the last prisoner to reappear from Alcatraz. Through the course of the investigation, Madsen and Soto will learn that Agent Hauser has known about the prison’s secret history and has been awaiting the prisoners’ return. Soto will witness his life’s work – the history of Alcatraz – come alive. Madsen will be forced to keep her supportive San Francisco cop fiancé, JIMMY DICKENS (Santiago Cabrera, “Heroes”), at arm’s length from the highly classified assignment as she sees everything she thought she knew about her family’s past shattered, all while fighting to keep the country safe from history’s most dangerous criminals.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: Bad Robot Productions, Warner Bros. Television, Bonanza Productions Inc.

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: J.J. Abrams, Bryan Burk, Elizabeth Sarnoff, Danny Cannon (pilot)

WRITERS: Elizabeth Sarnoff, Steven Lilien, Bryan Wynbrandt

DIRECTOR: Danny Cannon

CAST: Sarah Jones as Det. Rebecca Madsen, Jorge Garcia as Dr. Diego “Doc” Soto, Sam Neill as Emerson Hauser, Parminder Nagra as Lucy Banerjee, Robert Forster as Ray Archer, Santiago Cabrera as Jimmy Dickens, Jonny Coyne as Warden Edwin James, Jason Butler Harner as Associate Warden E.B. Tiller

GUEST CAST: Jeffrey Pierce as Jack Sylvane

The ‘Tastic Says: OK, for everyone with Lost withdrawal like us, this is the show we’ve been waiting for.  Looks like Lost meets Fringe meets Prison Break.  We just hope the Losties transfer over to FOX and find what will no doubt be a gem of a show from J.J. Abrams.  The smartest thing that they have done with this show is to air it mid-season, meaning ZERO hiatuses which exactly what needs to be done with serials during this era for any hope of success.

The following new animated comedy will premiere in midseason on FOX:

Napoleon Dynamite

Based on the hit film, NAPOLEON DYNAMITE is an animated series that follows the continuing adventures of America’s most awesome awkward teenager and his quirky family and friends as they struggle to navigate small-town life in rural Idaho. The original cast from the film – Jon Heder, Aaron Ruell, Efren Ramirez, Tina Majorino, Sandy Martin, Jon Gries and Diedrich Bader – will voice their characters in the series, and many new characters will be added along the way. NAPOLEON DYNAMITE (Heder) is a 16-year-old boy convinced – for no apparent reason – that he is destined for greatness and blessed with unlimited “sweet abilities.” He spends his days practicing ninja moves, drawing ligers, soul dancing and bragging about his “girlfriend in Oklahoma” whom nobody has ever seen. Napoleon’s brother, KIP (Ruell), is an unemployed 32-year-old who lives at home and believes he would be an amazing catch for any girl who would respond to his online come-ons. The Dynamite brothers live with GRANDMA (Martin), a crusty woman who can often be found four-wheeling with her lady friends at the local sand dunes. Napoleon’s allies include PEDRO (Ramirez), his unflappable best friend who has recently been elected class president; and DEB (Majorino), an incredibly sweet girl who sees the good in Napoleon and dreams of someday being his wife. Napoleon’s UNCLE RICO (Gries) lives out of an orange custom van, where he obsesses over his botched high school football career and dreams up ways to become rich and famous. Then there’s REX KWON DO (Bader), a self-proclaimed martial-arts master who runs the local dojo. Guest voices in the debut season include Jennifer Coolidge (“American Pie,” “Legally Blonde”), Sam Rockwell (“Choke”) and Jemaine Clement (“Flight of the Conchords”).

PRODUCTION COMPANY: 20th Century Fox Television

CREATORS/EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jared Hess, Jerusha Hess, Mike Scully

VOICE CAST: Jon Heder as Napoleon Dynamite, Jon Gries as Uncle Rico, Aaron Ruell as Kip, Efren Ramirez as Pedro, Diedrich Bader as Rex, Tina Majorino as Deb, Sandy Martin as Grandma.

The ‘Tastic Says: Oh, you’ve gotta be f*cking kidding us!  Who’s brilliant idea was it to pick up an animated series based on a film that was a gimmick that wasn’t that funny to begin with when it aired seven years ago?  We’ve gotten married and had three kids since this was popular (no joke),  for Pete’s sake.   As with Allen Gregory, we think there’s a reason FOX only ordered six episodes of this.

The following drama is in development and slated for midseason:

Touch

From writer/creator Tim Kring (“Heroes,” “Crossing Jordan”) and executive producers Peter Chernin and Katherine Pope  comes TOUCH, a preternatural drama in which science and spirituality intersect with the hopeful premise that we are all interconnected, tied in invisible ways to those whose lives we are destined to alter and impact. Through masterful storytelling, the series follows a group of seemingly unrelated characters – beginning with a former firefighter tormented by his inability to save a dying woman, an Iraqi teenager who will go to great risks to help his family, a gifted singer whose actions at a karaoke bar save lives thousands of miles away and a British businessman desperately trying to retrieve a key piece of information from his lost mobile phone – who affect each other in ways seen and unseen. At the center is MARTIN BOHM (Kiefer Sutherland, “24”), a widower and single father, haunted by an inability to connect to his mute, severely autistic 10-year-old son, JAKE. Caring, intelligent and thoughtful, Martin has tried everything to reach his son who shows little emotion and never allows himself to be touched by anyone, including Martin. Jake busies himself with cast-off cell phones, disassembling them and manipulating the parts, allowing him to see the world in his own special way. After multiple failed attempts at keeping Jake in school, Martin is visited by social worker CLEA HOPKINS, who insists on doing an evaluation of the Bohms’ living situation. Although new at her job, Clea sees a man whose life has become dominated by a child he can no longer control. She believes his attempts to communicate with Jake are just wish fulfillment, and determines that it’s time for the state to intervene. But everything changes when Martin discovers that Jake possesses a gift of staggering genius – the ability to see things that no one else can, the patterns that connect everything. Jake is indeed communicating after all. But it’s not with words, it’s with numbers. And now he needs Martin to decipher their meaning and connect these numbers to the cast of seemingly unrelated characters whose lives they affect. Along the way, Martin will be guided by BORIS PODOLSKY, a discredited aging professor who offers Martin a compelling but unorthodox theory about Jake and his rare ability. Whether it be chance, coincidence, timing, synergy or fate, there are events that touch us all, as part of an interconnected, dazzlingly precise universe.

PRODUCTION COMPANIES: 20th Century Fox Television, Tailwind Productions, Chernin Entertainment

CREATOR/WRITER: Tim Kring

EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Tim Kring, Francis Lawrence, Peter Chernin, Katherine Pope, Kiefer Sutherland, Suzan Bymel

DIRECTOR: Francis Lawrence

CAST: Kiefer Sutherland as Martin Bohm

The ‘Tastic Says: OK… this does look very good and very intriguing but there’s an elephant in the room regarding this:  where’s it going to fit?  Touch was not listed in the primetime schedule for FOX for Fall or midseason so what is FOX planning on killing by January?  This show is a major player.  You don’t get Tim Kring and Kiefer Sutherland and premiere them on Friday nights.  Scheduling issues notwithstanding, this show is very SciFi and it better not be to confusing or it’s going to drive audiences away.  Not us… no, we’re in it for the long haul but the rest of the “normies” will probably freak if it starts getting a little complicated. 

(Sorry, no trailer available yet.)