Upfronts 2012: CBS Cancels A Gifted Man, Rob, CSI: Miami, Renews Two And A Half MenCSI:NY

Ahead of the tomorrow’s upfront event, CBS renewed Two and a Half Men, canceled A Gifted ManCSI: Miami and Rob.

The writing had been on the wall for A Gifted Man since really November and we were shocked that it got a full season order but it was really over when main cast member, Julie Benz, was announced as being cast for SyFy’s epic new series, Defiance, back in March.

The only question regarding CSI: Miami‘s cancellation was whether or not it would have been the only show in the franchise to be canceled and it is as CSI: New York has been renewed and CSI was renewed in March.

Rob was just horrible and unfunny as are all of the comedies on CBS but considering that CBS comedy viewers have no taste at all, we expected it to be a hit… just as the increasingly awful (and of course, renewed) Two and a Half Men is.

CBS Cancels Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior, Renews CSI: New York

CBS announced Tuesday that they have canceled the Criminal Minds spinoff, Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior and renewed CSI: New York for another season.  There’s not really much to say, we don’t watch either shows but despite the expert prediction, we didn’t have any doubt that CSI: New York would be renewed as a lead-in to the recently renewed Blue Bloods.

CBS: Blue Bloods, Hawaii Five-O RENEWED… The Defenders, $#*! My Dad Says, Canceled… Person Of Interest PICKED UP!

H-50: See ya This Fall!

The New York Times is reporting that CBS has renewed Blue Bloods, Mike & Molly, and Hawaii Five-O.  No surprise about any of these shows and in fact last week, we predicted BB was a sure thing with the news that the show’s creators, Mitchell Burgess and Robin Green, had been ousted.  The logic:  why fire the creators a week before the upfront media events if you’re going to cancel the show?  H-50 is a lot of fun but it’s a hit-and-miss show and not nearly as good as the pilot had led us to believe.  We simply refuse to watch M&M because we know how awful it is without ever having to watch a single episode and we are saddened by the fact that audiences continue to be so stupid when it comes to the sitcoms they’ll accept in their living rooms every week.  But then again, this is the same audience that made that horrible show Two and a Half Men a hit.

As far as cancellation is concerned, some sanity has prevailed at CBS, dumping the worst sitcom ever made, the horrific $#*! My Dad Says (a show that every time we mention it, we feel we should advise our readers to read our review of it if for no other reason than it’s a quality PSA), a comedy we had ZERO interest in Mad Love (that was a comedy, right) and a very underrated show we actually liked a lot, The Defenders, starring Jerry O’Connell and Jim Belushi.

J.J. Abrams (left), Jonathan Nolan (right)

As far as new pilots are concerned, CBS has officially announced that the J.J. Abrams/Jonathan Nolan series Person of Interest (which we had reported on back in February with much enthusiasm) will be added to the Fall 2011 – 2012 schedule, as well as the comedy Two Broke Girls.

From The Hollywood Reporter:

Jim Caviezel, Michael Emerson

Stars Jim Caviezel (The Passion of the Christ) as a presumed dead former CIA agent who teams with a mysterious billionaire (Michael Emerson, Lost) to prevent violent crimes in New York. Taraji P. Henson (Boston Legal) co-stars in the Warner Bros. TV drama from scribe Jonathan Nolan (The Dark Knight), who produces alongside J.J. Abrams, Bryan Burk (Fringe), Ben Brafman (The 4400), Margot Lulick (Kings) and Greg Plageman (Cold Case). Dave Semel (No Ordinary Family), who directs.

Two Broke Girls 

Revolves around two 22-year-old women (Kat Dennings, Beth Behrs) who tackle life in New York as they try to make their dreams come true. The multicamera comedy from Warner Bros. Television is written by Michael Patrick King (Sex and the City) with stand-up comic Whitney Cummings on board as a producer. James Burrows directed the pilot.

NBC Cancels Outsourced, Law & Order: L.A. & The Event, Passes On Wonder Woman… Renews Chuck

On Friday, NBC announced the cancellation of Outsourced, Law & Order: Los Angeles and The Event.  We predicted every single one of these cancellations months ago.

Outsourced (from our Fall 2010 Post Game Wrap-Up on 01/13/2011)

Outsourced is one of the most disappointing shows this season but it’s not because it’s a bad show. It’s cute and it’s clever but it’s a sitcom trying to be funny and it’s really not. We pointed out in our review that the problem is that the novelty of the culture clashes and funny accents only works for about ten minutes, yet Outsourced is an entire series that revolves around those gimmicks… If we’re going to watch a sitcom, we want it to be funny. Outsourced unfortunately is not. It’s currently leaning toward “the-more-likely-to-be-renewed-than-not” category but we doubt audiences are going to continue to tolerate it until May.

Law & Order: Los Angeles (from our review of the show on 10/09/2010)

And before you say to yourself, “Well, this could be different,” I’m going to have to stop you right there because, no, it’s not going to be different. Do you know how I know? There are two obvious reasons. First, take a look at the first sentence of the show description by NBC:

“Law & Order: Los Angeles” fuses classic ripped-from-the-headlines storytelling with the distinctive backdrop of LA – delving into the unique attitudes, cultures and crimes of the West Coast.”

The first thing that they mention as a selling point is what made the show suck to begin with (the “ripped from the headlines” crap). It’s the reason that people stopped watching… period, you unoriginal nit-wits at Dick Wolf Productions.

This show is nothing more than the original Law & Order that just got cancelled after 20 seasons except for the fact that it’s set in L.A… This whole show is just awful and no one is getting a free pass.

The only reason it’s getting three stars is because it’s not as bad as Outlaw.  I expect it to be canceled by the end of the season.

The Event (from our What’s Wrong With The Event and How To Fix It In Five Easy Steps piece back on 12/22/2010)

Unfortunately, since its premiere, the audience numbers have dropped steadily and the show is on life-support at this point and it’s completely unnecessary… The truth is that the long hiatus (new episodes will not air until March 7, 2011) may be the final nail in the coffin for The Event

What is a surprise to us, however, is that NBC has ordered 13 episodes for a fifth and final season of Chuck.  We got bored with it but we didn’t hate it and we’re glad that a fan-favorite was picked up for one last hurrah.

In related news, the awful David E. Kelley, Boston Legal-clone Harry’s Law has been renewed by NBC and just when we thought NBC had ZERO standards remaining they did smartly pass-on Kelley’s reboot adaptation of the comic book classic that no one ever reads, Wonder Woman.  Tracie Thoms, who would have played Diana Prince’s best friend Etta, had this to say about the news via Twitter:

I am very sad that NBC passed on Wonder Woman. But that just goes to show you: There is no such thing as a “sure thing” in this biz.

Sorry to disappoint you, Etta, but there is one sure thing in Hollywood:  that show would have reached the highest level of suckitude© imaginable.

DAYTIME ALERT! ABC Cancels All My Children & One Life To Live After 42 And 44 Years Respectively

On Thursday, April 14th, ABC announced that they would be canceling their mid-afternoon, long-running soap opera mainstays in favor of two “lifestyle” shows ending a run that has lasted for a combined 86 years of programming.  Now normally, this isn’t really our cup of tea to discuss but this a momentous occasion in television history to say the least, considering just how long these shows have been on and how popular they have been over the last four, going into five, decades. Of course, there’s also the nostalgia factor of these being Mom’s favorites going all the way back to when we were toddlers and we can remember her looking forward to them at 1:00 p.m. and 2:00 p.m, respectively.  Don’t bug Mommy… her “stories” are on.

"Hi, everyone! I just wanted to let you know that we think youre all doing a bang-up job. Just a heads up though: were announcing that you are all fu*king fired in twenty minutes. Take care... oh, and if you happen to have any studio property, please leave it in the designated box at the security desk when you leave today. Thanks and again: Awesome job, everyone!"

EW is reporting that the actors were told of the decision less than 20 minutes before the press release was issued, with the cast of All My Children being informed in person in Los Angeles, while the cast of One Life to Live was told via remote video conferencing… like in that George Clooney movie, Up in the Air.  Well, we guess the glass-is-half-full approach would be to say that it could have been worse… they could have found out 20 minutes  after the press release was issued.   All My Children will air its final episode in September 2011 and One Life to Live will air its final episode in January 2012.

These schedule changes will not affect General Hospital, the second most popular daytime drama on television.

On the upside, at least Susan Lucci  and her fans will (hopefully) finally stop griping about winning only one Daytime Emmy award in the last 42 years.

Via the Longest Press Release in Television History:

ABC EVOLVES THE FACE OF DAYTIME TELEVISION WITH THE LAUNCH OF TWO NEW SHOWS, “THE CHEW” AND “THE REVOLUTION”

Iconic Shows “All My Children” and “One Life To Live” Will Broadcast

Their Final Episodes in September 2011 and January 2012, Respectively;

Series Will Sunset in a Manner That Honors Viewers and the Shows’ Creative Legacies

Guided by extensive research into what today’s daytime viewers want and the changing viewing patterns of the audience, ABC is evolving the face of daytime television with the launch of two new shows, “The Chew,” which will premiere in September 2011, and “The Revolution” (working title), which will premiere in January 2012. These new shows expand ABC Daytime’s focus to include more programming that is informative and authentic and centers on transformation, food and lifestyle — cornerstones of programming that resonates with daytime viewers as evidenced by the success of “The View.”

As food has become the center of everyone’s life, “The Chew” will focus on food from EVERY angle — as a source of joy, health, family ritual, friendship, breaking news, dating, fitness, weight loss, travel adventures and life’s moments. Produced by Gordon Elliot, the Emmy Award-winning executive producer of “Paula Deen’s Home Cooking” and “Down Home with the Neelys,” this new one-hour series combines entertaining takeaway with memorable personalities to create a live show where viewers get the dish on anything and everything related to the world of food and beyond. Whether it’s new trends like food trucks and urban gardens or how pesticides in our food may affect our health, we can’t stop talking about it. The hosts who will guide the hour include Mario Batali (Restaurateur, Food Network’s “Iron Chef America” and author); entertaining expert Clinton Kelly (TLC’s “What Not to Wear”); Carla Hall (Bravo’s “Top Chef”); Michael Symon (Restaurateur and Food Network’s “Iron Chef America”), and nutrition expert Daphne Oz, who simplifies often confusing information about food.

From Executive Producer JD Roth and 3 Ball Productions, producers of “The Biggest Loser,” “Masterchef” and ABC’s upcoming “Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition,” comes “The Revolution,” a Daily Show about health and lifestyle transformations. The show is hosted by a team of experts and rotating guest contributors who help viewers transform all areas of their lives, from relationships to family, food, style, home design, finance and more. This dream team, led by fashion expert Tim Gunn, also includes celebrity trainer Harley Pasternak and American Idol alum Kimberley Locke. The show features a unique concept: each week one woman’s five-month weight loss journey will unfold in just five days, with daily results and a final transformational reveal on Friday. “The Revolution” is a one-stop shop for better living.

“While we are excited about our new shows and the shift in our business, I can’t help but recognize how bittersweet the change is,” said Brian Frons, President, Daytime, Disney ABC/Television Group. “We are taking this bold step to expand our business because viewers are looking for different types of programming these days. They are telling us there is room for informative, authentic and fun shows that are relatable, offer a wide variety of opinions and focus on ‘real life’ takeaways. A perfect example of this is ‘The View,’ and that factored into our decision. ‘The Chew’ and ‘The Revolution’ are in the same vein and will be great additions to the lineup, with ‘The View’ serving as an ideal foundation from which to launch these programs. They will also provide enormous opportunity for the creation of ancillary businesses and growth.”

“General Hospital,” the second-most popular show in daytime, is not impacted by this announcement and will remain on the air.

To honor the core, passionate audience and their rich history with our soaps, “All My Children” and “One Life To Live” will conclude each series in a manner that respects their legacies and the longstanding hopes of many of their viewers.

“‘All My Children’ and ‘One Life To Live’ are iconic pieces of television that have made an indelible mark on our culture’s history,” reflected Frons. “Each of the shows has touched millions and millions of viewers and informed the social consciousness. It has been a privilege to work with the extraordinary teams who brought the residents of Pine Valley and Llanview to life each day, and we thank the cast, crew, producers and most especially the fans for their commitment to the shows through their history.”

None of this could have been possible without the extraordinary Agnes Nixon. “More than 40 years ago, Agnes Nixon created both the worlds of ‘All My Children’ and ‘One Life To Live,’ worlds that the rest of us have been privileged to live in,” said Frons. “Her shows led the way forward, breaking a lot of rules along the way to defy expectations about what soaps can do and the issues they can cover.

I am honored to have worked with her.”

“All My Children” has revolved around the lives of the residents of fictional Pine Valley, a town which closely resembles the Philadelphia Main Line. “All My Children” took home the 1998 Emmy Award for Outstanding Drama Series, the third time the show received this top honor, having also garnered the award in 1994 and 1992. “All My Children” has received more than 30 Emmy Awards and consistently distinguishes itself in the field of daytime drama. The show has historically been committed to and is often the first to tackle social issues, focusing on such topics as AIDS, abortion, cochlear implants, teenage alcoholism, racial bias, acquaintance rape, spousal abuse, homosexuality, Reyes syndrome, Vietnam MIAs, drug abuse, the risks of motherhood over 40, safe sex, pet therapy and organ donations, among others. The show made television history airing daytime television’s first same-sex kiss between two lesbian characters, as well as daytime television’s first same sex wedding between two women. It was the first to chronicle the coming-out story of a transgender woman and to cast a real life Iraq War veteran whose story reflected his real life experiences and injuries incurred in combat.

“All My Children” premiered on the ABC Television Network on January 5, 1970, as a half-hour show; seven years later it expanded to an hour. Julie Hanan Carruthers is executive producer.

Also created by Agnes Nixon, Emmy Award-winning “One Live to Live” is set in the fictional town of Llanview, which is modeled on a Philadelphia suburb. “One Life To Live” debuted on The ABC Television Network July 15, 1968 as a half-hour show. Ten years later, it grew to a full hour in 1978.

“One Life To Live” has been lauded for its groundbreaking exploration of social issues, diverse canvas, award-winning performances and innovative storylines. Along with the history-making week of live shows in May 2002, “One Life To Live” is responsible for many “firsts” in Daytime television, including stories of interracial romance, illiteracy, medical misdiagnosis, racial prejudice, gang violence and teen pregnancy. The show received mass critical acclaim for its 1992 homophobia storyline, which captured national headlines when it introduced the character of a gay teen (played by then unknown Ryan Phillippe) and culminated with the emotional display of the Names Project AIDS Memorial Quilt. “One Life To Live” was honored by the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) with the Outstanding Daytime Drama Award in 1993, and again in 2005 and 2010.

In 2002 the show won its first-ever Daytime Emmy for Outstanding Drama Series, and was nominated again in 2007 and 2008. Created by Agnes Nixon, “One Life To Live” debuted on July 15, 1968 and marked its 10,000th episode on August 17, 2007. Frank Valentini executive-produces.